The water is mesmerizing. She has never seen anything as beautiful as the crystalline flow spilling over and around her. It surrounds her and becomes her. She watches each drop shatter against her skin, breaking into a thousand pieces, each one reflecting the light in every direction. Creating colors she didn’t know existed, greens and yellows, blues that rival the brilliant sheen of Dream.
Rushing past her ears, the water sings to her. It is an indistinguishable melody, but one she knows she has heard before. She begins to hum along as she rinses the blood from her hair. The red is beautiful too, as is slowly spirals away from her. She is almost sad to see it go.
Her dress is heavy, too heavy for her to hold, once she soaks it in the warm water. It sits around her feet. It looks comfortable, inviting. She lies down on top of it, letting the water rain down. It feels as though Dean is holding her, arms wrapped gently around her, fingers trailing lightly over her skin. She closes her eyes.
When she opens them again, she is freezing, her skin feels hard and her legs are stiff. She turns off the water and struggles to stand. It is nearly dark.
She wrings out her dress, slips it over her head. It is cold and wet, but she doesn’t care. She wants to go home. Stepping gently around the edge of the bed, averting her eyes, she grabs several bags of Dream and stuffs them into her purse. She hesitates. Then takes another DayDream, rips it open and empties it onto her skin. Rubbing it in hastily, she dials the front desk and asks for a cab.
Stumbling from the taxi, she lands on her knees in the gravel walkway leading to the front door.
“Shit, lady, you okay?”
She stands, brushing the rocks away. She tries to ignore the damp spot she has left on the seat, water dripping from her dress. Money exchanges hands.
The walk to the house seems to take hours, and she can’t remember her feet ever touching the ground. Reese is there at the door, and everything is red. Did she forget to wash the blood away?
But this is different. The air itself is red, a crushing, angry red. It vibrates through her, sets her teeth on edge. It is coming from her husband.
Even through the haze, she doesn’t have to ask. Somehow, he has found out about Dean.
She watches him speak, and realizes that though she has been afraid to hear this for so long, there is a raw beauty in the writhing and twisting of these words on his lips. She is free.
He opens the door for her, and lets her walk past him into the house. She does not stop until she reaches the bedroom and gently closes the door.
Pulling out the bags of Dream, she crawls into bed. She slides under the covers, wrapping them tightly around her. She opens one, then another, then another, letting the blue powder trickle over her tongue and settle on her gums and teeth.
Lana reaches over to the nightstand to set the empty plastic aside and glances at the picture of her and Reese, so long ago. When they had first moved into this house and she had taken such care to decorate each room, nesting Reese had called it, she had hung this picture where she would see it every day. It had been her favorite from their wedding. She had loved him so dearly then. She wished she could remember why.
She slips the band off to read the words inscribed inside. Love. Always. Reese.
Her head spins. She closes her hand tightly, holding on to the one piece of him she has not lost. It is only with fleeting sadness that she shuts her eyes.